Hi, I realized that last year, when I wrote about my difficulty in taking enough time to sleep and eat because of marking students’ essays, I also wrote the blog in English.

So I decided to write the gist of my last blog in English, too.

Last summer, I hardly had enough time to live ordinary life. I mean, I had to mark students’ essays and do the preparation for the next day’s several lessons by working through the night. At one time, I was able to lie in bed only 30 minutes. So I couldn’t get to work in time. Well, actually I was very late for class. 

Of course, that was not nice.

 In addition, I was told off by the principal about my coming in for work late. So I decided to stop marking students’ essays. 

The students of last year said that it was much better to tolerate my late coming than not having their essays corrected by me. So the 6th graders didn’t complain at all. The complaint came from the 5th graders (now they are the 6th graders).

When I decided to stop marking, I wrote that in my blog, and I linked the post to Facebook page. After reading the blog, the principal sent me a LINE. He told me to take back my decision to stop marking. He said they would pay me for marking. The reason why marking took so much time and also why it was important to school was that the essays were preparation for students’ entrance exam for Tokyo University. From the last-year set of students of my class, 17 students actually went to either Tokyo University or Kyoto Univerisity. Mind you, I won’t claim the credit for all of that. Students worked hard for themselves, and other subject teachers also made hard efforts. I was simply more than happy if I was able to help them get into universities of their first choice. 

The problem is, the school never paid me for marking, which they seemed to promise to pay. I even wrote how many papers I had marked so far and submitted it to the school. 

Yes, I understand. It would be more profitable if they could make me mark stundets’ essays for nothing. But then, they should have told me that they had no intention to pay me. They just suspended any decision about the payment. I don’t know this is usually the case with most schools; yes they are schools where young minds brush themselves up for their bright future. I do hope they would become a law abiding citizens with lots of promises to bring many good things to society. 

Now I don’t know what to do. Perhaps I should not have made a contract with the school, because I am hurting myself. These days I hardly feel my time is actually my time any more. It was bought cheaply by that school. I am sorry for myself. That is the stupidest thing I did to myself. I should have acted more cleverly. 

But being sorry for myself doesn’t bring me back anything. So I vow that I should save my mind. Even though that would cost my job, (if it can still be called a job, some part of which is already an imposed volunteer activity, though.)

Well, this could be an interesting reading material for my students. I am sure the content itself is interesting to them at least.  

I had a fear I would lose the job if I were too honest about this matter, but I do have to save my mind, which is bleeding badly.

This is not an insult to school. 

This is A FACT. 

I have a lot of cats to take care of, so I cannot choose to die like someone in a mega advertising agency. What I do, instead, is to save my mind. That is all.

Thank you for reading my confession. 

I love you.